A wife says to husband, "Today is your son's birthday. We still need to get him a present. What should we get?"
The husband says to his wife, "Well, what does he want?"
The wife replies, "He wants a watch!"
"OK, tell him tonight we'll let him."
NO LIES... JUST THE FACTS!
Sunday, September 5, 2010
Saturday, September 4, 2010
FLIGHT TO NEW YORK
A beautiful, well-dressed blonde seats herself in the first class cabin on a cross-country flight, and settles herself in for the trip, smiling prettily at admiring passengers seated around her.
Underway, a flight attendant soon approaches the blonde and says, 'Miss, I'm sorry, but I see that your ticket is for coach, and you're seated in first class; I'm afraid you'll have to move.'
The blonde replies, 'I'm blonde, and I'm beautiful, and I'm going to New York to be a model.'
Slightly incredulous, the attendant alerts the senior flight attendant.
The senior attendant approaches the blonde and says, politely, 'I'm sorry, Miss, but since your ticket is for coach, you'll have to move back.'
The blonde replies, sweetly, 'I'm blonde, and I'm beautiful, and I'm going to New York to be a model' -- and shows no signs of moving.
Frustrated, the senior attendant informs the captain, and he says he'll deal with the problem.
He turns over flight control, walks to the rear, and observes the blonde seated comfortably in first class.
Approaching her with a smile, the captain leans over and speaks quietly into the blonde's ear. Almost immediately, the blonde gathers her things, gets up, and moves quickly to the coach compartment. Amazed, the senior flight attendant asks the captain, 'Captain, I'm impressed ... what did you say to her?'
The captain grinned slyly and said, 'I just told her that the first class cabin doesn't go to New York.'
Underway, a flight attendant soon approaches the blonde and says, 'Miss, I'm sorry, but I see that your ticket is for coach, and you're seated in first class; I'm afraid you'll have to move.'
The blonde replies, 'I'm blonde, and I'm beautiful, and I'm going to New York to be a model.'
Slightly incredulous, the attendant alerts the senior flight attendant.
The senior attendant approaches the blonde and says, politely, 'I'm sorry, Miss, but since your ticket is for coach, you'll have to move back.'
The blonde replies, sweetly, 'I'm blonde, and I'm beautiful, and I'm going to New York to be a model' -- and shows no signs of moving.
Frustrated, the senior attendant informs the captain, and he says he'll deal with the problem.
He turns over flight control, walks to the rear, and observes the blonde seated comfortably in first class.
Approaching her with a smile, the captain leans over and speaks quietly into the blonde's ear. Almost immediately, the blonde gathers her things, gets up, and moves quickly to the coach compartment. Amazed, the senior flight attendant asks the captain, 'Captain, I'm impressed ... what did you say to her?'
The captain grinned slyly and said, 'I just told her that the first class cabin doesn't go to New York.'
Friday, September 3, 2010
Malaysian blogger faces jail over satirical post
A Malaysian journalist was charged Thursday over a satirical blog which made fun of Tenaga National, and faces a year's jail if convicted.
Irwan Abdul Rahman, a 36-year-old sub-editor with a Malay-language daily, pleaded not guilty in the Sessions Court to a charge of posting a fictitious comment.
He was accused of "intent to hurt" over the posting, entitled "TNB to sue WWF over Earth Hour" which jokingly said Tenaga would take action over the World Wildlife Fund's annual energy-saving initiative.
In an entry earlier this week, Irwan said on his blog http:nose4news.wordpress.com that he was hoping "for cool heads and a developed sense of humour to prevail".
He has deleted the offending item, which he said was merely "a stupid joke that does no one harm".
Malaysia's opposition condemned the prosecution as "not only harsh but ridiculous".
Does this mean a satire or a joke is now illegal in Malaysia? What has become of our country?
Malaysia had a great tradition of satire, which was also used in the independence struggle against British colonial rule, and that the government must respect freedom of expression.
Irwan's prosecution has caused a stir because unlike the mainstream press, the web and online media in Malaysia have remained relatively free, despite occasional raids, bans and government criticism.
Major newspapers and broadcasters are closely linked with the ruling coalition, so the Internet has become a lively forum for dissent and debate.
Irwan Abdul Rahman, a 36-year-old sub-editor with a Malay-language daily, pleaded not guilty in the Sessions Court to a charge of posting a fictitious comment.
He was accused of "intent to hurt" over the posting, entitled "TNB to sue WWF over Earth Hour" which jokingly said Tenaga would take action over the World Wildlife Fund's annual energy-saving initiative.
In an entry earlier this week, Irwan said on his blog http:nose4news.wordpress.com that he was hoping "for cool heads and a developed sense of humour to prevail".
He has deleted the offending item, which he said was merely "a stupid joke that does no one harm".
Malaysia's opposition condemned the prosecution as "not only harsh but ridiculous".
Does this mean a satire or a joke is now illegal in Malaysia? What has become of our country?
Malaysia had a great tradition of satire, which was also used in the independence struggle against British colonial rule, and that the government must respect freedom of expression.
Irwan's prosecution has caused a stir because unlike the mainstream press, the web and online media in Malaysia have remained relatively free, despite occasional raids, bans and government criticism.
Major newspapers and broadcasters are closely linked with the ruling coalition, so the Internet has become a lively forum for dissent and debate.
Thursday, September 2, 2010
MALAYSIA IS 13TH
Malaysia has been ranked 13th in a global survey conducted to gauge travel freedom enjoyed by the citizens of various countries.
Britain, Denmark and Sweden topped the list with scores of 166, 164 and 163 respectively.
The index ranked countries according to the visa-free access its citizens enjoy to other countries, Henley & Partners said on its website.
Malaysia, with a score of 151, was ranked above countries and territories such as Liechtenstein, Hong Kong, Brazil, South Africa, Montenegro, Russian Federation, United Arab Emirates, Thailand, India, Egypt and China.
Henley & Partners said it had analysed the visa regulations of all countries and territories in the world.
“This is the first time that a global ranking shows the international travel freedom of the citizens of the various countries, as well as the international relations and status of individual countries relative to others,” it said.
The company noted that in today’s globalised world, visa restrictions played an important role in controlling the movement of foreign nationals across borders.
“Almost all countries now require visas from certain non-nationals who wish to enter their territory,” it added.
Britain, Denmark and Sweden topped the list with scores of 166, 164 and 163 respectively.
The index ranked countries according to the visa-free access its citizens enjoy to other countries, Henley & Partners said on its website.
Malaysia, with a score of 151, was ranked above countries and territories such as Liechtenstein, Hong Kong, Brazil, South Africa, Montenegro, Russian Federation, United Arab Emirates, Thailand, India, Egypt and China.
Henley & Partners said it had analysed the visa regulations of all countries and territories in the world.
“This is the first time that a global ranking shows the international travel freedom of the citizens of the various countries, as well as the international relations and status of individual countries relative to others,” it said.
The company noted that in today’s globalised world, visa restrictions played an important role in controlling the movement of foreign nationals across borders.
“Almost all countries now require visas from certain non-nationals who wish to enter their territory,” it added.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
New budget terminal to be completed by April 2012
Due to be completed in April 2012 the new budget terminal will cost more than 2.5 billion ringgit (800 million dollars), officials said at a ground-breaking ceremony Monday.
Tan Sri Bashir Ahmad, Managing Director of Malaysian Airports Berhad which runs most of the nation's airports, said the date was later than an earlier target of end-2011 because of delays in building the runway on marshy palm oil plantations.
He said that although the cost of construction was put at 2.5 billion ringgit, "it could be more than that so we will see."
Tan Sri Bashir said the new terminal would be the biggest dedicated low-cost terminal in Asia with a floorspace of 237,132 square metres and able to handle 30 million passengers annually.
It is located less than two kilometres from the main Kuala Lumpur International Airport terminal, much closer than the current budget terminal which is a 10-minute drive away.
The main tenant by far is AirAsia, the Malaysia-based pioneer in regional budget travel which fought a long battle with airport authorities over the design and facilities of the new terminal.
AirAsia founder and CEO Dato Seri Tony Fernandes welcomed the start of work on the new terminal and said the carrier would have to accept the delay in completion.
"There's nothing we can do about it. We have to live with it. Of course we would have liked it much earlier, we did feel that the soil was going to be a little bit of a problem but we will make do."
Fernandes said his carrier had been given a guarantee that airport charges at the new terminal would not rise. He said the planned delivery of new aircraft would not be deferred as they could be redeployed to its Indonesian and Thai operations.
Tan Sri Bashir Ahmad, Managing Director of Malaysian Airports Berhad which runs most of the nation's airports, said the date was later than an earlier target of end-2011 because of delays in building the runway on marshy palm oil plantations.
He said that although the cost of construction was put at 2.5 billion ringgit, "it could be more than that so we will see."
Tan Sri Bashir said the new terminal would be the biggest dedicated low-cost terminal in Asia with a floorspace of 237,132 square metres and able to handle 30 million passengers annually.
It is located less than two kilometres from the main Kuala Lumpur International Airport terminal, much closer than the current budget terminal which is a 10-minute drive away.
The main tenant by far is AirAsia, the Malaysia-based pioneer in regional budget travel which fought a long battle with airport authorities over the design and facilities of the new terminal.
AirAsia founder and CEO Dato Seri Tony Fernandes welcomed the start of work on the new terminal and said the carrier would have to accept the delay in completion.
"There's nothing we can do about it. We have to live with it. Of course we would have liked it much earlier, we did feel that the soil was going to be a little bit of a problem but we will make do."
Fernandes said his carrier had been given a guarantee that airport charges at the new terminal would not rise. He said the planned delivery of new aircraft would not be deferred as they could be redeployed to its Indonesian and Thai operations.
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